To Those I Hurt,
I’m sorry. I left when things got hard. I made decisions I shouldn’t have. I wasn’t the leader I was called to be. I didn’t love you well.
I realize now that if I am ever going to have the deep intimacy in friendship and relationships that I crave, that we all crave, I have to be honest. I have to live in vulnerability and admit my faults.
We’re broken humans trying to love broken humans. Each and everyone one of you have taught me more about myself and about God. We didn’t do everything right. Things went wrong, feelings got hurt, tears were shed, and some goodbyes had to be said.
But through it all, I’ve realized without all that we went through I would not know what I do now. No relationship will satisfy like mine with Jesus, but I still need you. Humans need humans. God gave us each other for refinement, for laughter, for friendship, for memories, for someone to cry with, for someone to love.
You brought more life to my life and I hope I brought something to yours. So here I am saying that I want things to be different. I want to be better, not perfect, but better. I may never see you again but you taught me something. We never may be in each other’s lives again and that’s ok. Wherever you are, whoever you are surrounded by, love them well. Ask for forgiveness, forgive, be vulnerable, and don’t give up. We can do this, we can have healthier relationships.
Here’s to the future days of knowing more of who the Lord is and knowing more of each other. Here’s to starting fresh and living in relation like Jesus does.
These words are coming from a deep place in my heart, they are to specific people but also to any human in relation with another human. Take these words back to the Lord and ask for his perspective. He alone knows how to live perfectly and forgive deeply. He alone is our strength and council while we live in relation to others. Thanks for reading.
-Katherine
